Before I start though, I have to say that I'm feeling out of the loop with this whole blog thing. Here's why...I don't have any snazzy nicknames for my husband or kids...it seems this is really popular out there. Is it because I should be afraid someone will try to find us if they know our REAL names? Just wondering. I could call Adam - "Dum" or something. I also don't have any fancy BIG words or different fonts or different colors in the body of my text. Is this bad? I think I need all these things, I must have them. Let's give it a try.
Have you ever noticed that it only takes ONE person to make you feel as if you exist...or don't exist?
A friend who calls you out of the blue to see how your day is going.
Someone, who should care, that doesn't return your phone calls.
A note from a dear 90-year-old Grandmother to tell your two girls (and you) ,
"I Love You!"
Telling your woes to someone, only to find it wasn't kept in confidence.
A friend who shows up on your doorstep with offerings for dinner, because they know you're struggling.
Your daughter patting you on the back (like she's the mother!) when you're blubbering like a baby.
There's more, there's ALWAYS more. Some of these have happened to me recently, and some I've seen happening to others. Lately I feel lost in a sea of selfish people (me probably being one of the worst of them) and it's getting harder and harder to find the life raft with the self-less people on it. I see it in the greed of THINGS and the greed of POPULARITY, and the need for self-gratification. I feel disgust, and it's all that's on my mind lately. Thank you for those people who have showed me the life raft, or I might have drowned by now.
Because of this, I've been able to feel even more gratitude than I thought I would ever feel for being POOR. That's right, I said it...I'm glad to be POOR. Not because I like wondering how we'll pay for the mortgage or groceries next month...that is NOT fun. But, it is nice to realize that my life was full of THINGS. Things I don't need...cars I don't need...clothes I don't need. They don't define me. What defines me is being the person that shows up on my friends doorstep to see how her day is, or sending that thank you note for the kindness sent my way.
Now...would some of YOU people out there (not necessarily the YOU people that are reading this!) PLEASE stop being blinded by your own trials and start seeing others? It will help you to see that your trials are only for the moment...remind me of this later will you?...and not for eternity. It's really more important to be the kind of person who makes people feel as if they exist, rather than not. Don't you think?
On a side note...as I was bathing the girls tonight, Audrey informed me that tomorrow they were going to be "good" girls. To which I replied, "Uh-huh, I have absolutely no faith in you whatsoever." I really should try harder.
5 comments:
Would it be selfish to say I hope I'm on the life-raft with selfless people on it?:o Maybe...
I bet those cute girls really are going to be good today!:)
Love you.
It is amazing how trials help us to see what is truly important in life. This past year, we have had enough trials to last us a lifetime, but you know what??? Each one of them helped me to learn and grow and that is worth more than any amount of money in the world!
Glad you used your blog to rant! It is always good to just let everything out instead of keeping it bottled up.
Good luck with everything! :D
Attagirl!! I loved reading your rant! You put it so plainly and I appreciate your spirit! I love ya Rach! I hope you know you can call me if you need anything! I miss hanging with you more than you know! Remember the good old bank days? Drive-up? Keep on plugging along!
I should be a better friend. Thanks for the reminder! You're a great example!
And yeah, that is why I use nicknames for my kids. I just remember reading something about how to protect your kids on blogs and that was a recommendation. However I'm sure it wouldn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who they were if someone really wanted to, but somehow it makes me feel better.
It's been awhile since I read your blog but I really liked your rant =). I totally think you are right, whenever I have had a hard time I try to help others with their trials and forget mine. I find that my own trials all of the sudden don't seem so big at all. We love you guys and hope you are doing ok this holiday season!
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